One doesn't not simply start a zombie blog without first identifying what exactly zombies are...
First off, before we can embark down the never ending rabbit hole of the zombie apocalypse, we need to identify exactly what type of zombies we are dealing with. I can't go off on my zombie survival adventures with all of you poking holes in my ideas now can we?
There are so many different variations of zombies portrayed throughout pop culture, ranging from the slow moving "dumb as a box of rocks" undead zombies to the fast, deadly, smart (terrifying) infected zombies, it's impossible to be prepared for all of them at the same time. For the sake of argument, in each case I will specify exactly what type of zombie we will be dealing with.
First, let's set some ground rules as to what is common throughout a zombie, regardless of the type. Zombies are ultimately humans that have been infected by the disease/virus/bacteria/radioactive waves etc. to make them lose their sense of self-awareness and their identify. They do not care for anything other than the consumption of human flesh. They will seek out human flesh regardless of the circumstances, cost or sacrifice to themselves. Zombies also are seen typically with a lemming mentality. One single zombie will not go off in a different direction simply because they had a different idea than the rest of the group. They cannot be cured and they are impervious to any type of trauma except for a blow to the brain. So let's identify our zombie types shall we?
Type 1: Romero Zombies (the stupid undead)
Think George A. Romero's 1968 film Night of the Living Dead.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0063350/
These zombies have some very specific qualities. Their most cherished quality being their complete stupidity. These would be the ideal zombies to come face to face to, as the ultimately give humans the advantage. They do not know how to think critically and perform much more than basic motor skills. The slowest of the zombies, you can easily stay ahead of them while maintaining a job or even a brisk "power walk". They are easily distracted and have very short attention spans. Let's review their strength and weaknesses:
Strengths:
Brute Force
Silence (these zombies have nothing to say to us)
Increased endurance/no need to rest
Numbers
High Aggression
and
Weaknesses:
Lacking in advanced motor skills (no opening door for this guy)
Impaired critical thinking abilities
Short attention span
Reduced speed
Type 2: Kirkman Zombie (Typical Zombie)
Think Kirkman's hit AMC show The Walking Dead.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1520211/
These zombies are the ones I will be referencing most office throughout my endeavors. While I'm not a fan of The Walking Dead (too much people drama and not enough zombie drama), I feel Kirkman really portrayed an excellent zombie. If you were fit and fast as a human, you're probably fit and fast as a zombie? Where you a slowpoke as a human? You're a slowpoke as a zombie. Ultimately these zombies are my preference because they are what I imagine a zombie would really be capable of in the event of a plague.
Let's review:
Strengths: (can you spot the trend below?)
Average cognitive skills
Average motor functions (can operate basic doors and mechanisms)
Average Strength
High Aggression
Average Speed
Notable specific Weaknesses:
Noise (these zombies are very noisy and aren't very good at sneaking up on you)
Predictability
Type 3: Brooks Zombie: The Relentless Undead
Max Brook's highly acclaimed novel World War Z portrays a very unique type of zombie.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_War_Z
In this case we are going to focus solely on the book (the movie was a complete abomination). They never give up and they never surrender! Seriously, these zombies are pretty much terrifying. Among their very notable qualities is their relentlessness for prey. If they catch the scent of prey they will never give up the attempt to catch it unless the scent fades. Simply put, you're locked up in your bunker with a zombie right outside because they saw you go in, you will never have even the remote chance it will give up and wander off. That zombie will still be waiting for you in two years if it knows you're there. They are also relentless in the sense they will pursue you with every cell in their body. They have to be pretty much pulverized before they can be considered dead. Lastly, one of their most terrifying qualities is their moan. A Brooks zombie will be silent unless they catch the scent or see prey. They will moan indicating they've found something worth hunting, which will have the effect of drawing any zombies within the vicinity. Those zombies will in turn moan, causing a huge ripple effect and drawing all zombies within miles and miles to a single location. Bottom line is: life with these zombies is ridiculously difficult. Their two weaknesses are freezing and time. Brooks zombies' bodies decay over time and they will freeze and "hibernate" in cold temperatures, allowing humans a brief respite during winter.
Let's review:
Strengths:
Never gives up
Moan summoning other zombies
Difficult to kill
Silent unless on the hunt
Weaknesses:
Natural decay/the passing of time
Freezing
As I stated previously, I will mostly be working with a Kirkman zombie. They are (in my opinion) the most realistic form of zombie. I purposely exclude "infected" variants of zombies, such as 28 days later zombies. My personal opinion is these variants of zombies are in fact NOT zombies, but rather simply infected humans. When dealing with The Infected, there are simply too much variations to address them all.
Now that we've got that out of the way, onto the fun stuff! Let's go learn how to siphon gasoline!
~Z.A.S.G.
scientia potentia est
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